Write your own FLSA Rules!
Rockie
2,136 Posts
Put on your creative (and diabolical) thinking caps and come up with some of your own rules and regulations that can be submitted for consideration for changes to the FLSA!
1. Employees may not be required to go home if there is no work for them to perform. It is not their fault if you can't manufacture work for them. They can always sit in the hall or another employee's office just shooting the breeze - preventing that employee from getting his work done. If this puts him into overtime, so much the better.
2. Fridays are now optional workdays for employees. If they are required to come in, it is expected they will be paid double time.
1. Employees may not be required to go home if there is no work for them to perform. It is not their fault if you can't manufacture work for them. They can always sit in the hall or another employee's office just shooting the breeze - preventing that employee from getting his work done. If this puts him into overtime, so much the better.
2. Fridays are now optional workdays for employees. If they are required to come in, it is expected they will be paid double time.
Comments
>employees. If they are required to come in, it
>is expected they will be paid double time as
>well.
Especially if they have a hangover!
>portion thereof are to be provided a paid
>one-half hour break during which the company
>shall provide milk and Oreos, nappy mats and
>soothing music.
Our teachers are already paid for this, so compliance will be a piece of cake.
Occasionally a member of the corporate staff will be found "helping out" in a classroom during naptime so a teacher can go to lunch. It's a hardship, but we are quite loyal to the company.
The day after Thanksgiving, when not a previously allowed paid day off, will be set aside for the annual "look at my big belly" contest. Winners will be awarded as such: hourly employees will receive one day comp time; salaried employees will receive "leave early today, wink wink" time that may or may not equal one full day, no one will know because no one will keep track.
Extra time will be allowed for those who get a manicure on their lunch hour and require additional drying time.
Watching Oprah on company time is a legitimate business need.
Chatting in the ladies room is paid team building time, and smoke breaks are part of the company's stress reduction campaign, sponsored by EAP.
*disclaimer: this does not mean they have to actually perform any work, just show up for it.
Other television shows may also be considered under this policy, subject to the employee submitting justification of the work-relatedness of the show's content.