Porno Cake

Rockie

This is the second time since I've been with this practice that a bunch of women in offices have gotten together and given a birthday cake to someone in the shape of a male body part.

This latest episode was in a remote office and the person who brought the cake in just couldn't understand "why" this was inappropriate since it was done "privately". My statement was "It ain't so private anymore since the entire practice knows about it!

I cannot, for the life of me, figure out why people think it's appropriate to bring stuff like this into the workplace.

Do any of you guys have stuff like this going on in the workplace?

HRinNH

By "guys" are you referring to the lot of us fellow forumites or only the male gender?

safety

We have a machine that puts a wax coating on product and one morning an object made from wax in the form of a male body part was discovered by a female worker. She brought it to me and an investigation began. None of the ee's who worked on the machine would claim the work as theirs so we issued discipline to all who worked on that machine. It has not happened again.

rad

Atleast you didn't try the Cinderella method of discovering who it belonged to x}>

safety

>Atleast you didn't try the Cinderella method of discovering who it belonged to x}>


Given the size of the object this method would never have worked!

ray a

What is the Cinde.... oh never mind, I get it.

LarryC

Sounds like a famous "Friends" episode, where the same type of cake showed up. If it showed up here, I would tell the person to either get rid of it or cut it and reshape it. Who would even want to eat it? Nevermind. As I type this I can already see the hands going up.

I did have a situation where a lady came to work wearing a green shirt with the Green Bay Packer "G" logo on the front. I didn't pay any attention to it until someone brought it to my attention that I should take a closer look at the shirt. In small letters around the "G", it said,"If you're nice to me I'll let you touch my "G" spot." As much as I would have liked to have been "nice to her" so as to avail myself to the privelege as advertised, I did tell her to turn it inside out or go home and change. Ah, the temptations of the job.

mcmel

The Packers have that same effect on me. x;)

ray a

We did have a well endowed young lady working for us who liked to lift her shirt for the guys. Some of the guys would take her to a local establishment after work and whe would entertain them. Reportedly, her entertaining occurred in several private offices, too. I wouldn't know first hand though.

Parabeagle

I was deployed to another base in the early 90s for a period of time that coincided with my birthday. I was conducting a joint investigation with the Safety Office and the staff (1 male 3 females) found out it was my birthday. They took me to lunch at a nice restaurant, and presented me with a cake in the shape of, uh, some rather spectacular female accoutrements. I have been told I turned a beautiful shade of scarlet and everyone thought it was hilarious that I couldn't even bring myself to cut it. Turns out one of the female Safety staffers baked it herself (don't know who she used as a model), so I felt obligated to cut it - quickly - and pass it around.

I later took the NCO in charge of the Safety Office aside and explained that it probably wasn't the best image in the world for the Air Force to project in a public restaurant (especially while we were all in uniform) and he replied that I was right and he didn't think about it until after the fact.

I do still have pictures, though. x:-)

LarryC

See Rockie? That's what you should do. Conduct a "joint" investigation.

Don D

I knew you would start some crap before the week was out Rockie! x:=|

Leslie

Female employees were throwing a quick BD party for another. Someone gave her a "toy" that vibrates. She decides to pose with it in a very provocative manner. Someone snaps a picture. The picture somehow circulates. She ends up termed!

Rockie

By referring to you as "guys" this is generic, pertaining to all Forumites. I guess I could have said "Y'allllll".

Anyway...I forgot to tell you - uns what the inscription on the cake said "A hard man is good to find". (Hope I don't get drummed off the Forum for this one.

Have a Good Weekend!!!!

AnneHa

Two years ago, one of our staff members was scheduled for a hysterectomy. On her last day before surgery one of her co-workers (male) brought in a cake baked in the shape of a uterus. (His mom had helped him.) Inscribed on this lovely work af art was the inspirational sentiment, "Gone, but not forgotten".

Anne in Ohio

LarryC

Where can you buy uterus shaped cake pans?

rad

I think thats sweet.

Don D

Rockie: The whole of the limerick is: A good man is hard to find. A hard man is good to find. This will stay up at least through the weekend. But, hey, I'm just the messenger for Christ's sakes.

HRQ

Many years ago one supervisor was holding a baby shower for another supervisor after the end of their shift, in the breakroom.

I took a peek at all the stuff she was bringing in: chocolates, a cake and party favors all in the shape of a man's you-know-what. I made her move the party off site.

Until then, it never occurred to me to ask what the theme of a baby shower would be. I do now!

Don D

Why is it that only women do this silly crap? Don't they realize sexual harassment and inappropriate workplace behavior cuts both ways? Really.

HRQ

Mmmm - not ONLY women, Don, but I know what you mean.

For some reason, some people don't seem to get it. Currently, I am investigating an employee grievance. She claims her supervisor (also female) has done the following;
- slid a cracker through the employee's cleavage, credit card style, then ate the cracker
- stood behind her "like a man" while the ee was bending over. When asked to explain what she meant, she demonstrated a, um, humping motion
- pinched her rear end so hard it left a bruise.
- kissed her on the lips

Now we are a touchy feely group of people in general, but REALLY. I guarantee that if the supervisor were treated this way by a man, she'd already have called an attorney.

And in not so ancient history but with a different company, a male hotel maintenance engineer enjoyed strategically placing "lost and found" sex paraphanelia (sp?) in a male General Manager's office and on his car. The GM played right along with it by placing those objects in the maint guy's locker, car, etc.

Don D

"Lost and found sex paraphenalia?". Sliding crackers through cleavages? Women humping each other from behind? God! I realize you're close to California..........But, Heaven help you!; I thought yours was a day care environment for children. Please get professional help for the entire staff, immediately.

HRQ

The Lost and Found stuff was from my hotel days. Guests left stuff behind all the time.

The crackers/humping thing completely shocked me. This supervisor is a bit rough around the edges (as in poor writing skills, uses slang a lot) but never in a million years did I expect that kind of behavior. I am now wondering how much of this kind of behavior has happened before that just didn't make it to my office. She's been with us for about four years, although recently promoted to a supervisor.

Don D

Have you considered either 'fast tracking' your investigation or suspending the alleged offender during the investigation? Knowing that yours is a setting full of helpless children who obviously cannot defend themselves or offer up protest against those in authority in most cases and, based on the allegations alone, you may well have an aggressive, lesbian employee with some very serious sexual-misbehavior issues in your workplace. If this turns out to be true, it could turn your facility into a ghost town overnight.

If she acts out like that with a non-consenting adult, imagine her behavior with little girls in the bathroom.

JudyT929

This would never happen in the ultra conservative environment I work in now; but about 20 years ago I worked in an insurance sales office where it did. It was the sales managers 30th birthday and all the "gals" in the office got him a cake in the shape of a "you know what" with ears. He was quite the player but also a good listener. He thought it was hillarious. Funny thing though as of a few months ago he and I are now dating. He seems to think more with the correct head now...